Leaving on a Jet Plane?

All my bags are packed, I’m ready to go…wait a minute. I can’t take that shampoo, conditioner, hand lotion, lipstick, sun tan lotion, face cream, toothpaste, contact lens solution, or hair gel in my carry-on bag. Toss that bottled water, too. Thanks to insane terrorists, if I need to pack anything liquid, cream or gel I have to check my bag.

I hate checking luggage. I’m always afraid I’m going to arrive at my destination to find that my bag has been accidentally routed to Hawaii and is now having a better vacation than I am. If I’m going on a short trip, I try to put everything in a carry-on bag. Tiny bottles of shampoo, conditioner, mini hand lotion and lens solution, just big enough to last a few days, have always been a regular part of my carry-on packing routine. If I take a nap on the plane, when I wake up I need to put drops in my eyes to loosen the grip my contact lenses form on my eyes. Sometimes I need a decongestant or some Advil, so I’ve always travelled with a bottle of water. Now I’ll have to wait for the flying waitresses to bring me a drink. Plus I have to hope against hope that my bag and all of its contents will arrive before it’s time for me to turn around and go back home.

I haven’t taken many trips since 9/11/01 but now, thanks to this new wave of idiot terrorists, I will be even more inconvenienced when I fly. Eventually we’ll all be flying in the nude. That’s not a pretty picture.

Looks like I’ll be driving to Vegas this year.